Anxious

To pain my heart selfishly dooms me,
My senses have devoured my soul.
This cruel love tortures, consumes me,
Love I know I will never control.

Mad with passion, I bow before you…
I despise and adore you…

~ Phantom of the Opera


I run through centuries, years, days, and countless minutes to you. To your passion, your fire, your drive. Your anger and happiness. Your tears and joy. Your constant progress, creativity and strive. Your wisdom.

You move me. You motivate me and give my soul everything it could ever dream of.

The minute we met, I felt I could fly freely without turning back. It was my point of no return as I realized you were what I was longing for. Your endless energy that fills wide streets and every skyscraper is what I need to live a grand carnival and not a gray existence. It’s my addiction.

Decades ago you opened your arms to millions of immigrants who were looking for a better life because you knew that their diversity and aim will evolve your essence, develop you, and create who you are today. You. New York. Full of art, amazing restaurants, fashion, intellectual debate…. You are the heart of the finance industry and the minute it stops pulsating, your global roots spread around the Universe start dying.

You harbor the voyagers, the speakers, the pilgrims. You host conferences, competitions, shows. Regardless of the disasters you went through, you carry your pain buried in your deepest corners with eternal optimism. Because you know that tomorrow is a better day. A day that brings new beginnings and opportunities.

And because of that, my darling, you make me feel alive.

This past month and the distance separating us has been a torture.  With so many things happening lately, I barely can sit still because I know that in two weeks I’ll inhale your warmth again and taste your spring kiss in Central Park. And like a Suzie on her very first date, I’ll get butterflies in my stomach. I’ll sing and run smiling with my eyes wide open.

Restless, yet inspired I anxiously await our date on May 28th.

“What longing in tears for you – You – my Life – my All – farewell. Oh, go on loving me – never doubt the faith fullest heart of your beloved. Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours.”

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s